


Metal Sonic and the No Good, Very Bad Rec Job

by WhoreHouseFanfics



Category: Sonic the Hedgehog - All Media Types
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-25
Updated: 2017-08-25
Packaged: 2018-12-19 15:25:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11900583
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhoreHouseFanfics/pseuds/WhoreHouseFanfics
Summary: Metal Sonic by Miranda of Whore House Fanfics





	Metal Sonic and the No Good, Very Bad Rec Job

AN: AU where Metal sonic words as a low-level frontline receptionist at a university rec center. These are his adventures…  
It was a hot summer day when Metal Sonic was sitting at the desk at his minimum wage job. It wasn't the worst thing in the world, but it put bread on the table and that's what mattered. What really got to him was the crazies that would come in and ask for ridiculous things or came in just to yell at a worker about something that he had no no power over. Metal Sonic spent most of his time dicking around on the internet and guessing which people who came in will be difficult. He was correct most of the time.   
During one of his mind-numbing Reddit sessions, Metal heard the phone next to him ring. He picked up the phone and answered.  
“Rec Services, how can I help you?” he stated in a fake cheery tone that he had mastered through his years of working in customer service.  
“Yea uhhh…” said a low voice from the other end. Some people just weren't good at making phone calls. Metal waited in annoyance while the person stumbled over their words. “Uhhh, my name is Knack the Weasel and I left my water bottle on one of the weight racks, and I really love that water bottle. Can you find it for me?”   
Metal sighed in annoyance and concern for what that man was doing to his water bottle. “No problem,” he said. “Let me transfer you to the lost and found,” That was one of many weird phone calls of the day. He went back to his usual fucking around. Of course not even two minutes later the phone rings again, right when Metal Sonic found a particularly interesting thread on Reddit to waste his time with. He let out an audible groan and picked up the ringing torture device.  
“Rec Services, how can I help you?” Metal Sonic’s chiper facade was beginning to break, as his voice was gruffer than before.  
“Can I get in contact with Wave the Swallow?” said the voice from the other end. Metal Sonic didn't bother asking this person’s name, since he didn’t care He looked at the contact sheet for all Rec Employees but did not find what he was searching for.  
“I’m sorry,” Metal fake apologized. “I do not have the number, do you know what department he works in?”   
“He’s the executive director for the university,” Metal Sonic could not believe what this idiot was asking for. Why would a student worker have the contact information of one of the higher ups of the university?  
“I apologize, sir, but you are calling the Rec Center. We do not have such information” He tried to explain, but to no avail.  
“B-but...isn’t this the university?”   
“Yes, but this is the Rec Center” he answered in an annoyed tone.  
“But this is the university!” Metal had no clue what this guy was trying to prove.  
“Yes,” hel tried to explain in his calmest tone possible. “But as I told you before, this is the University Rec Center. You will have to call the main offices to get the number you are looking for.”  
“How do I find that number?”  
“How did you find this number?”  
“I looked it up online”  
“Well, there’s your answer. Goodbye.” Metal Sonic slammed the phone back on the receiver and excused himself to the bathroom, where he repeatedly hit his head against the wall until he felt brain dead enough to deal with the last thirty minutes of his shift. Right as he sat back down at his desk the phone rang again. Metal Sonic let out a loud scream before he picked it up.  
“Rec Services, how can I help you?” He couldn’t even sound annoyed anymore. He was dead on the inside.  
“Hello this is Madonna. How can I get a job at the Rec Center?” This question was asked frequently and it was obvious that the person did not even check online since they would have known that they have have to attend the job fair and that calling would do no favors. Metal Sonic explained to the asshole that she also needed a cover letter and a resume with her application.  
“What’s a cover letter?” Madonna asked in a voice that only a dumb white bitch is capable of producing.  
“Listen bitch if you don’t know what a cover letter is then you probably aren’t qualified for this job. Don't ever call here again,” Metal Sonic slammed the phone back on the receiver and then slammed his head on the desk, where he remained hoping that he killed enough brain cells to stop breathing.   
It wasn't until Dr. Eggman came into the Rec Center did things get interesting. He came stumbling on in and waving his hands around frantically. “I NEED THREE!” Eggman shouted in an incomprehensible accent.  
Now Metal Sonic was tired, and Metal Sonic only had fifteen minutes left in his shift, and Metal Sonic did not wanted to deal with this shit. “Excuse me sir, three of what?” he asked in the politest way he could to mask his apathy.   
“I NEED THREE” the bumbling idiot shouted, raising his voice even more and pointing to the children playing in the lobby after their day camp let out. Metal Sonic wasn't sure what kind of facility this man thought this was, because it’s a little illegal to sell children. But what did he know?  
“Sir, are you wanting three weeks of summer camp for your child?” Metal asked, assuming this man wasn’t a child molester looking to buy some fresh ones.  
“Yes...camp...three”   
“What weeks did you want?” Metal asked, fully knowing that this was a loaded question. Eggman continued to ramble in any language that was not English and Metal did his best to try to fucking understand. After about twenty minutes of torture and trying to get Eggman to sign a waiver and trying to explain the fact that this is a day camp, not an overnight one where he could dump his shitty kid off, the transaction was finally complete.  
“Alright sir, your total for three weeks of camp including the deposits and weekly balance payments is $350”  
“So...expensive...why?” Metal sonic was NOT about to try to break down the price to this moron. He was already five minutes over his shift.  
“And how will you be paying today, sir? Metal asked, completely avoiding the question that he already answer multiple times. His voice, while still saccharine-sweet, had an edge on it. He watched as Eggman shuffled around in his purse for awhile.  
“I sorry, i left card at home. Come back other day,” Eggman said, laughing at his own blunder not knowing the shit storm that was about to rain down on him. Metal Sonic could feel his fake smile fade, slowly warping in the crazed smile that one might only see on serial killers and the one weird uncle that everyone has. There is always one…  
“DO YOU EVEN KNOW HOW LONG IT TOOK ME TO HELP YOUR FOREIGN ASS?!” Metal yelled at the top of his lungs. Many of the other patrons and workers at the Rec stopped and turned around to look at the commotion. “HOW DO YOU EVEN FORGET YOUR CREDIT CARD YOU MOTHERFUCKER? YOU CAME HERE WITH THE PURPOSE OF PAYING FOR CAMP. GET YOUR DUMBASS OUT OF HERE RIGHT NOW!” Metal stopped shouting for a moment and did a quick survey of the area. Most of the people around stopped watching and went back to whatever to hell they were doing before, realizing this is just day-to-day customer service. Metal Sonic reached for his register and open the drawer, taking it out and dumping all of the contents on the floor. Why count his drawer when he could beat a motherfucker with it? And that's just what he did.  
Eggman laid beaten and bloody on the floor while Metal Sonic laughed maniacally. He got his stuff together and walked out the door, not giving a single fuck. He went home and watched anime for three hours so he wouldn’t feel so dead inside. Later that day his boss called him and praised Metal sonic on how well he handled the issue. Metal Sonic got a raise and a promotion as the official Rec Services Ass Kicker, where he lived happily ever after.


End file.
